|
infatuation_junkie
|
read my profile
sign my guestbook
Name: infatuation_junkie
Interests: listening to the rain. daydreaming. seeking escape from mundane routines. graphic design. writing.
Message: message me
Member Since:
4/24/2003
|
|
SubscriptionsSites I Read
|
|
|
|
| it's been a good four whole years. we've had our moments together. thank you for being there when i needed an avenue to hammer out my thoughts and figure things out, and all the times when i needed a place to express my anger and frustrations. you've been nothing but good to me, and i'm sorry i phased you out of my life in the past 2 years. something else had come into my life that was there to listen to me when i needed someone to talk to. and though i realized that it slowly and eventually eroded on my independent thought, i let it go because i was happy. without really knowing it consciously, i let my guard down and let myself fall.
alas, things change. i no longer have that someone to be there for me - and it's time for me to find my own voice again. and while you have been so good to me in the past few years, i'm craving a new start and something fresh. i almost feel like i need to forget the past two years for now and be able to stand strong. and you are just too much of a reminder of so many things. thank you for being there to contain all of my memories.
it's time for me to grow too - to see the word beyond the boundaries that you have built for me.
xoxo | | |
| is finally coming out with a new album!
"this delicate thing we've made" - out on august 20, 2007.
i. can't. wait.
i just spent the last hour reading up on darren hayes news...he's going indie now! a far cry from the columbia mainstream savage garden days. but i really enjoy the new sound. "the tension and the spark" was fantastic and i cannot wait till the next album.
i am SO glad he is still making music.
www.darrenhayes.com | | |
| is much easier said than done.
forgiving is something i find myself having a lot of trouble doing. whether it's with others (big things, of course) or myself. but definitely more so of myself.
having had a long reflective chat about careers and such with someone very dear to me earlier this evening, i headed to my evening flash class. on the ride home, somehow, it all hit me again. i started - perhaps quite unconstructively - thinking about how things could have been different. and the infinite "what if"s begin. and i start thinking about how perfect everything could have been, how much happier i would be, the different opportunities i would be exposed to...
and it goes on and on.
sometimes i really wonder when i'm going to forgive myself. the hardest part, of course, is knowing that i could've done better. that i have more to offer than i showed.
to get so close to living a dream and then watching it slip out of my fingers was just so utterly heartbreaking. and though i rebounded, that seems to have done more harm than good.
i had tried my best to move on. to acknowledge the unfortunate circumstances and just...move on. i figured i would just block it out of my memory. pretend that it never even happened. but every now and then it comes back and breaks my heart all over again.
and i hope that one day, i will be able to forgive myself, stop wondering the what ifs, and truly move on. because looking back only brings tears, and does little else. | | |
| i can feel a nice, long, reflective post at my fingertips. but for now, i've got to head for work for another day.
sorry i haven't been in touch lately, guys. working full time (and some) is a new lifestyle and i'm still trying to grasp the swing of things and tame that monster called facebook. one of these days i will clean up my entire inbox and finally feel refreshed.
till then. | | |
| "relationship management"
i'm such a damn business student - because no other kind of nerds would even think of such a term.
the term and its application brings very mixed feelings. hmm... | | |
|
